Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Annoying Yappers

I'm sure we've all experienced walking past a fenced yard and having a little yappy dog bark all along the fence at you until you have passed. I couldn't help but draw a comparison between those annoying yappy dogs and hardcore Jesus fanatics.

You see, as you are walking past the yard with the yappy dog, you have no intention of crossing the fence or entering the property. To the dog, however, you are an invader and it is his/her job to scare you away. As you approach the property the dog barks and growls as you walk the entire length of the fence.

From your paradigm, you have just walked past a yard with a yappy dog, but to the dog, he has successfully defended his property and driven away the invaders. Of course, the dog just thinks he has won a great victory, when you could have easily jumped the fence and kicked the annoying little dog over the house!

The yappy dog is not unlike the hardcore Jesus believers who see every coincidence as a miracle performed by Jesus. The yappy annoying barking drove away the evil, just like their continual praising of Jesus keeps making little miracles happen all over the place. Every breath they breathe is because Jesus blew it into their lungs. When they piss, Jesus is squeezing their bladder...

The little yappy dog is so proud every time it chases away an invader just as the fanatical Christians take the fact that they can breathe and piss as proof that Jesus is real.

And I seriously don't know which is more annoying... those damn yappy dogs or Jesus fanatics!


Tim Young said...

"And I seriously don't know which is more annoying... those damn yappy dogs or Jesus fanatics!"

Amen. You are right on.

And I'm a pretty radical Jesus follower myself. I'm sorry for the ones who act like idiots.

Tyson Devereux said...

Your double negative argument kinda put a hamper on your analogy

Atheists are like a methane gas leak - at first there seems to be no apparent danger, but then after a while you begin to feel tired, drowsy and eventually you lose all consciousness - see, I can come up with some lame metaphor too

Mormon411 said...

You know, Tyson, I don't mind a good debate, but when a person comes in here and is just an a$$hole throwing insults around, then I do mind. So unless you actually have something constructive to say, don't say anything.

If I'm so lame and boring that I put you to sleep, then why even bother confronting me?

Tyson Devereux said...

wow - the second someone doesn't agree with your amazing revelation , you get all offensive

sounds like calling the kettle black, don't ya think?

Mormon411 said...

When someone comes in here throwing insults with nothing intelligent to say, I simply call them on it. How would you like it if I came to your blog and started insulting you? It is already set in your mind that I am bitter and angry, so anything I say will be automatically interpreted as such.

Why do you keep coming back anyway? Don't bother unless you can engage me in a non-insulting manner.

Tyson Devereux said...

Insulting? Have you ever read your blog. Your whole blog is about insults.

So because I don't agree with you - I'm now unintelligent? Why do I keep coming back? Are you outcasting me now because I believe different than you? (Didn't you just post something about mormons outcasting - and now you do the same thing) It's okay to be hypocritical, I'm not judging. Just own up to it man - seriously, you sound like my younger siblings - "Stop bothering me"

Look, I just come back to read what else you have somehow come up with, and like I said, I'll call you on it. I don't even know what I said that was insulting. I was simply saying that your analogy was . . well, lacking. You weren't at your best, it's okay. I'm sure you;ll come back next time with a really good one. Hang in there

Exhalted Outcast said...

Argue on, I love a good argument. Let's see who has the better "chops". Let's see if I can come up with a better argument:

It rained on Tuesday last week so it will rain every Tuesday.

I drove to work and didn't crash so God exists.

likeatotallie said...

I wasn't intending to say this but I'm like Exhalted Outcast; I like arguments.
Well, I just came in here to say that I do agree with you that I understand. I can't hold a proper conversation with my schoolmates because of this irritating condition they seem to have. When I score well, it's because God loves me and when I fall sick, it's because I don't believe in him.

Mormon411 said...

I hate arguing but love a good debate. In this case, it's just insult slinging and that is neither productive or intelligent

likeatotallie said...

Well...Won't say that I like arguing but I'm the type of person who actually likes chaos so arguments are fine as long as it doesn't involve. I know, really selfish.

Anyway, really love this blog. You put up a really good atheist argument. Been refering your blog to some friends. Most of them love it too. Good luck with 'evangelising'.

Mormon411 said...

That's an interesting point of view but to each their own. Thanks for sending your friends. Hope they all "learned something"!