The Horrible World of an Apostate

According to a TBM, there are only a few reasons why someone would ever leave the church.

• Someone offended them
• They committed some sin

That's pretty much it! I want to talk about the second one.

The reason I left the church is because I committed some (or many) act(s) of breaking the commandments of the Mormon church. This is otherwise known as sin. I committed this sin and the holy spirit immediately withdrew from me. Once that happened, I entered a state of continual confusion also known as a "stupor of thought". My life spiraled out of control and things only got worse and worse and worse. The only way to escape all the guilt was to pretend to no longer believe in it. The only way to justify my sins was to shun god and remove him completely from my life.

This is the story of an ex-Mormon as told by a TBM. I had to kick god out of my life as it was the only way to feel any sense of relief from my overwhelming and growing burden of sin.

So it's obviously no wonder, then, when a TBM confronts an apostate they have a completely condescending attitude. I am a huge sinner and they are in full obedience to the church. Obviously I am a huge piece of shit! Or to quote an unknown TBM, "swine".

So, my problem progressed to the point where I had to shun god. It was the only temporary relief I could find. I shun god because obviously everything bad that has happened to me is his fault. Naturally, once I shut god out, I can receive no more blessings and his spirit is completely withdrawn from me. I am left to navigate this cruel and heartless world completely on my own. Of course, I am going to completely screw up and my life will only get worse. This will happen until I, in complete humility, come crawling back to god, begging his forgivness.

He will forgive me, of course, but not before making me go through even more hell, otherwise known as the repentace process. Only by completely kissing up to god and the Mormon church can I ever be forgiven. The longer I had defied the church, the longer they will make me pay the price before the light of christ can thaw my frozen heart.

They wish.

The flaw with this Mormon thinking is that it all assumes that the church is absolutely true. Now, I am going to share some aspects into the life of this crazy ex-mo. Any members of the church who read this are going to outright deny it and claim (or at least believe) that I am lying through my teeth in attempt to mislead even more of god's precious children. Remember, as long as I am not with god, then I am with satan. I now work for satan and everything I say is a huge lie, so don't listen to anything I have to say.

Personal life:

Never better. Ever since leaving the church my self esteem is improved dramatically. I can give presentations and talk in front of small groups and be completely confident. Ever since I left the church, I have given way more service than I ever did as an active, believing member. All the guilt from past "sins" is totally gone and I have never felt better about myself. I love people more than I ever have before, and I spend several hours a week giving service and helping people, all without asking for pay. When people offer to pay, I refuse it.

Finances:

According to LDS, Inc., the number one rule of thumb is to pay your tithing first. If you do, everything else will work out. Well, I payed tithing and there was money left over for all the bills and necessities. But only just. Ever since leaving the church, my finances have boomed. I have paid off all debts (credit cards and vehicles) and even have a substantial savings! Every year, my finances get better and better! And it's due, in part, by the 10% I have been able to invest each month in myself, rather than in LDS, Inc.

Education:

I attended school years ago as a TBM and did okay. I pulled mostly C's. I have been going back to school since about the time I became inactive, and guess what?!?! I have pulled mostly straight A's! And that's even without the help of the inspirational holy ghost! Now I understand that maturity and goals have a lot to do with it, not just being ex-mo. But isn't an apostate from the lord's only true church supposed to have a stupor of thought and not be able to get anything right? Think again! Coz I'm doing awesome!

Bottom line:

Ever since I quit going to church, realized it is a crock of shit, and kicked god out of my life, things have only gotten better for me. I can think clearly. I don't live with this delusion that some ghost is whispering the right answer in my ear. I'm happier, wealthier, and smarter than I ever have been before!

Either god blesses apostates too, or god isn't real. Either way, the typical Mormon propaganda about what happens to those who "fall away" is simply not true at all. In fact, it's a lie. A scare tactic to keep people paying, praying, and obeying!

I am an evil apostate from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I have never been better!

An evil apostate...