Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Brilliant "Plan" of God

In response to Child of God, who has posted more Jesus preaching (and graphic pictures), I have written this post to analyze the great plan that god came up with to save his children.

At birth we are sinners. Because Adam sinned and fell from the grace of god, all mankind is damned. Because of this, something must be done to save us from our inherited sin or else we go to hell. God sent Jesus who suffered and died on a cross so that we could all be saved because only a sinless being could atone for us. Those who accept Jesus into their hearts are forgiven for the sins of Adam and dwell eternally praising god.

God is all knowing and all powerful. He is perfect. He is the creator of all. The beginning and the end. Our heavenly father who loves us more than we can comprehend.

So far, I think Child of God would agree with me.

So...

God, who is all knowing, creates the earth and puts Adam and Even into the Garden of Eden. All is going great until Eve decides that she would rather listen to a snake than to god. You see, god (for some unexplained reason) put a tree in the garden. Anyone who eats the fruit from the tree will "surely die". Eve was tempted by the snake and ate the fruit. Adam, at this point, had no choice but to eat the fruit too; and he did. Adam and Even gained the knowledge of good and evil but were kicked out of the Garden of Eden.

So now that Adam and Eve are fallen, all of their children are born into this fallen state, entirely fucking up gods plan for people to live in paradise on Earth forever. But if god is all knowing, wouldn't he have known this would happen? Couldn't he have prevented it by either 1) not putting the damn tree in the garden in the first place, 2) put a really tall fence around the tree, 3) just prevent the snake from being able to talk, therefore not being able to tempt Eve.

So god set up his really stupid plan and Satan fucked it up immediately. Now all of mankind has to pay the price because god is a dumbass. We are all going to hell just for being born.

God is the creator of all things. So we must assume that means he created hell as well. God loves us, doesn't he? So why did he even create hell? He wants all of us to be saved from his stupid plan that failed. And because it failed, we all go to the hell that he created, through absolutely no fault of our own. So, gods "plan B" involves trying to save as many of his children as possible from going to hell.

God is all powerful, so he makes all the rules, right? So it must have been him that made the rule that all fallen people go to hell. Why would he have made hell and then made the rule that all fallen people go to hell if he didn't want you to go to hell? Because god is stupid, mankind fell. God made hell but doesn't want anyone to go there. Yet he made the rule that everyone who falls goes there. He then tries to outsmart himself by finding the loophole to bybass all of this silliness.

Enter Jesus! No one really knows for sure what Jesus is. He is the son of god but he is also god. So he is his own father? No? His own son? This is getting really confusing. Anyway, whatever Jesus is, he came to earth via a virgin mother.

I don't understand this either... God created everything so that means he created sex. A woman who has never had sex can never be pregnant. But god decides that he will do a little magic trick and bypass his own method for us to reproduce. That's right. He made the rules and then breaks them (isn't that a sin?)

So somehow Jesus shows up. Since he only has one parent, he must have only 23 chromosomes instead of the usual 46. That might explain a few things!

Anyway, god's brilliant plan B (that he came up with all by himself) was to send his favorite son to earth to be whipped, beaten, mocked, spit on, and ultimately crucified. Somehow, by his sons violent death, man is saved!

This makes no damn sense at all! We are saved from Adams sin because Jesus got his ass whipped? Is there something I am missing here? Nope, that's the plan. Whip the shit out of Jesus and we are all suddenly saved. Once again, god made this rule. He could have just made a different rule that said, "Everyone is saved!" But instead, he makes a plan that involves having his son whipped and killed, and this will somehow magically save all of us from our sins. Yes, I don't get it either.

God, seriously? You are in charge here and all you have managed to accomplish is get mankind eternally screwed and your son tortured. All of this could have been avoided if you had just used that "power" you have and prevented any of this from ever happening.

Meanwhile, Satan is still running around trying to get as many people as possible to not believe in Jesus. You see, you are only saved if you believe that he died. That's it. Just believe. He actually did die, but you only get the benefit of it if you believe it. God made that rule too.

So Satan runs around and deceives people. God doesn't like this. God could, if he had one ounce of brains, just say a magic word and make Satan go away so that more people would believe. But god just sits there and lets Satan wreak havoc on his perfect plan.

And this whole time, god knew it would happen. And although he is all powerful, he somehow still fucked it all up. He made all the dumb rules and then tortured his son so that the rules could be bypassed. A smart god would have just made new rules. Hell, I'm not that smart but I could kick gods ass in an intellectual battle.

So all of this shit happens and most of mankind goes to hell anyway. Jesus only manages to save a handful. So the majority of gods children, who he loves unconditionally, are doomed to roast in hell forever because he fucked it all up and is too proud to admit it (isn't being prideful a sin?)

When you THINK and use your BRAIN is it very clear that this whole story is so messed up that even a dumbass god couldn't have screwed it up this bad. And, even though he is a total fuckup, he demands our endless praise and adoration for how wonderful and marvelous he is.

Suffer the little children, right? No. How about make the children suffer. You see, if a believer prays to god to help find lost car keys, god drops everything in his busy schedule and finds your keys for you. But he has no time for those children of heathens in barbaric countries who are starving to death. Their prayers for food are ignored. Nope, gods priorities are your car keys and your internet connection.

Oh yea, and the reason we know about all of this in the first place is from an ancient book that nobody can agree on what it means and that contradicts itself terribly. This book says so, so it is so. God exists because the book says so. Jesus died for you because this book says so. Although there are thousands of books with different stories about gods and miracles, they are all false except this one.

This is gods devine plan in a nutshell: to find the loophole in his first plan that majorly backfired because he was dumb enough to put the tree right were Adam and Eve could reach it. God made the rule that if you eat the fruit, you fall. God made the rule that if you fall, you go to hell. God made hell. God doesn't want you to go to hell. God made the rule that if Jesus died AND you believe he died, then you get to be saved from hell. God made the rule that if you don't believe, you go to hell. God lets Satan run around screwing things up. God is all powerful but won't change any of the rules so that no violence is necessary. God could change all the rules. He could just say, "I, god, forgive you." No whipping and death of Jesus necessary.

This whole "god" and "Jesus" thing is just a story, and a poorly written story at that. But somehow it has millions of gullible suckers head-over-heels for Jesus. We live in the 21st century: the information age; yet the majority of our citizens believe in this nonsense as literal truth. We have put a man on the moon and yet we still believe in a story that was written in the stone age.

For the life of me, I'll never understand it. There is not even any evidence, outside of the Bible, that it is true. In fact, everything we understand about our world shows that the exact opposite is true.

You believe in your myth and dance around the bloody feet of Jesus all you want. Pray to your angry, jealous, vengeful, stupid god so that your will can change his all-knowing will. Kill all the people that your god hates. Shove your views on the whole world, by force if necessary. Death to all heathens and unbelievers because god loves a good blood bath (just read the Old Testament).

Atheist: A person who doesn't believe in this bullshit!

10 comments:

Dinahsoar said...

I've questioned this very thing myself. God knew how it would all turn out and still created the world.

My answer is this.

A woman marries a man she loves, has children with him. It is wonderful for many years. Then it turns bad. She is miserable and wishes she had never married him.

But had she never married him she would have never experienced the wonderfulness of the good parts, like her children and the part that was good until it went bad.

With that foreknowledge, were she to have the opportunity to erase the past and make the choice again, would she do it?

Would she miss the wonderfulness to escape the awfulness?

It depends doesn't it. On how much the wonderfulness exceeds the awfulness.

I think God, in spite of knowing that Adam and Eve would fall, created the world knowing that the wonderfulness would triumph over the awfulness in the end.

Ever heard the saying 'better to love and lost than never to have loved at all.'

We fall in love, marry knowing there is no guarantee. It is a given there will be disappointments, hurts, fights, heartache--and yet we marry, take the risk.

Why? Because perfection is over rated? No. Because the gain is worth the risk of the loss.

God created human beings and gave them free will. They chose to not follow him.

Yes he knew that would happen. But that is not the whole story.

Even though they disappointed him, there was also love and wonderful fellowship between them, even after the fall.

My children have oft disappointed me. I knew they would before I ever 'born' them. But I did it anyway.

Am I selfish?

I did it for love. Call me selfish if you will.

But the bad parts are exceeded by the love.

Twin-Daddy said...

"But the bad parts are exceeded by the love."

Really? Do you not realize that most humans will end up burning for all eternity? By any and all measures..evil will indeed win in the end.

You're children has disappointed you.. would you set them on fire and never put them out? That's just evil, and that's exactly "Gods" plan...

Your analogy is pretty badly flawed.

Exhalted Outcast said...

I am not sure if the analogy makes any sense. God could have easily just said, "here is your world, enjoy it." and left it alone. God didn't have to torture and burn more than 70% of his 'children' If I tortured and burned my kid, I would be in prison.

That's it: God is a child abuser.

He should be imprisoned.

Mormon411 said...

The whole point here, is that God screwed up everthing with the foresight that his plan would fail. If I had perfect foresight, I would never make a mistake because I would know what the outcome would be. This clearly demonstrates that the whole "god" story can't be true. God fails to exhibit any of his supposed awesomeness.

Tyson Devereux said...

I find your commentary entertaining on the subject. If you asked anyone about the Adam and Eve story - everyone would say they know it - but do they really? And this is so important. I have realized that people's beliefs come from their understanding of the Adam and Eve story - just like yours You call BS and everything else falls in line. However, most people don't understand or completely misinterpret the story

1. Earth is not a vacation home - I don't understand this idea of Earth being "paradise" - True, there was the Garden of Eden, but this was not a vacation spot. Why are we on Earth? Earth was created for us to come and learn new experiences to help us become like our Father. Example: Families. I understand more about God's plan and His ways after having children and knowing what it's like being a parent. We came here to learn and have Earthly experiences

2. God's creations are perfect - and so therefore could not create a world of hardships and suffering and imperfections that Earth is. He could not do it, but set up a plan that would allow it to happen, by Adam and Eve partaking of the fruit and by their choice disobey God, creating a no longer perfect world.

3. Sex is an Earthly experience - most people say they are mad that Adam messed up because we all would have been in paradise. The truth of the matter is that none of would have been born to be here any was because Adam and Eve could have no children. The scriptures say that they were as children, and we also know that sex is an Earthly experience, in which they knew nothing of.

Tyson Devereux said...

4. Adam did not "fall" - The scriptures call Adam the "Ancient of Days" and the Father of the priesthood. Does this sound like the same guy who "fell" from God? People say he "messed up" because they do not understand that Adam made the right choice. Yes, Adam made the right choice. People always point out that God told them to not eat the fruit. But they forget there were two commandments. The first was "Multiply and replenish the Earth" (but didn't I just say they couldn't procreate?) Exactly, they needed to break one commandment, to keep the other. It's like killing someone breaking into your home. Yes, you killed someone, but it was in defense of your home and family. Which one is more important? And that's exactly the choice Adam and Eve had to make. Now, we don't know how long it took, and they needed a little seducing from the "serpent" who thought he was making them "fall", but in reality helped them make the right decision, to keep the greater law by breaking the lesser. This decision, like all decisions, did come with the consequences, being removed from the garden of Eden and now living in a terrestial imperfect world.

5. There was no "Plan B"- I hate this phrase, even from Christians who believe that God is perfect and still say his first plan failed. It never failed. Adam made the right choice, we have the Earth we live on now for the purpose of learning and growing and finding joy. Yes, we can find joy and happiness in this life. People say that if they lived in "Paradise", they would have been happy. But to be honest, you would never known happiness, because you would have ever known sadness. You can't experience one, without knowing the other. I hate hardships just like the other man, but they have made me who I am, and have brought me joy in the end, and I don't go blaming Adam for my choices and misery. They are my own mistakes. We live in an imperfect world which God knew we would make mistakes and make wrong choices. He knew we would experience these things necessary to grow, but also knew that we must be redeemed from our sins. Christ was chosen to be the sacrifice for our sins and redeem us. This was not Plan B, it was always the plan. You do bring up an interesting question of how does one suffering erase the suffering of others? I don't know how, but the best example I can give is one being in debt to another, one begging for mercy and the other demanding justice. And a third comes in and pays the debt for the first, giving mercy and providing justice. Christ is that third person, giving us in debt mercy and meeting the demands of justice. He paid for our sins, if we look to Him we will be redeemed.

6. Many will be redeemed - There is a lot of suffering and bad people in this world, but there are thousands more good people that we tend to forget why try to do right. Most bad choices are merely bed mistakes that people seek forgiveness for. Take Paul for example. In his early days, people would consider him a murderer and a man of terror. But when given the light of the gospel, he became a disciple of Christ. We too can be redeemed from our ignorance and mistakes. And many people will. And for the children, the lie that children die in sin was created by the early catholic church to put fear into the people to baptize their children. All children are saved by Christ.

God is not this hateful, terranical person. God is a god of Love, who has provided us with this Earth to experience joy and happiness, and allow us to make choices to grow and become better and in the end be redeemed. I hope this clears things up and puts a better understanding of Adam and Eve. They should be Thanked, not cursed for what they have done.

Mormon411 said...

Tyson, your reply is so "Mormon".

"We came here to have earthly experiences." yada yada.

If god wanted man to live in a fallen world, why did he create a perfect one?

If god wanted Adam to eat the fruit, why did he tell him not to?

If Satan knew that god really wanted a fallen world, then he would not have tempted Eve to eat the fruit. Satan knew god's plan. He was there, supposedly, in the great council where every person in existance attended.

So Satan helped god? I don't think so. From the Biblical point of view, god wanted Adam and Eve to live in paradise. The Mormons have added in all this extra stuff about not having children, and the fall was what god wanted, etc.

I don't know why I'm even bothering to debate this with you. It's all bullshit either way.

Mormon411 said...

If you really think that god is not hateful and vengeful, then you obviously haven't even read the scriptures (particularly the Old Testament) which you profess to "know" to be true.

Tyson Devereux said...

Thanks for the "Mormon" compliment.

I don't think there's any need to answer the same questions that answered in my first post. If you have any real questions, I don't mind providing my answers.

I'm not intimidated nor do I have anything to apologize for with my beliefs, that you so strive for me to do. I just stumbled upon your blog, and I find it interesting, but feel it gets a little one sided.

Mormon411 said...

It is one sided. I won't dispute that fact at all. I am of the opinion that the LDS church is a lie and a fraud, founded by a liar and a fraud, and continued to be run by liars and frauds.

It is my opinion that there is no god and I also am not ashamed to state the reasons why I feel that way.

The only thing that I really see religion doing is creating sex offenders and then trying to cover it up. I'm not just talking about the Catholic church either. It happens in Mormonism more than you know.