Sunday, October 26, 2014

A Proud Missionary Mom

Within the last month, I have had a cousin enter the MTC and travel to his assigned mission.

His mother - my aunt - is one proud missionary mother.  Almost every day she posts on FB something about his mission, how choice and righteous he is, how proud she is, blah blah blah.

I have noticed that the LDS church isn't just a church.  It isn't just a lifestyle.

It is their identity.

I know that her proud feelings as a missionary mother are genuine.  I'm not trying to downplay them or make her look bad.

She is a missionary mother!  It is her short moment to be in the spot light.  To a Mormon parent, there is almost no higher honor than raising a child who serves a faithful mission.  And she is certainly taking every opportunity to make sure every body knows it!

I just can't help but think that if a person received true joy from their child serving a faithful mission, wouldn't that joy be it's own reward?  There would be no need to smear it all over FB.  It almost seems to me like a desperate cry for validation.

Because that's what Mormon life is really all about.  Fitting in.  Conformity.  Appearances. 

I would really appreciate your thoughts.  Am I reading too much into it?  Am I being too critical?


Andrew Hall said...

No. You are on the money with this. From what I understand about Mormonism a woman's sense of self is derived by her role as wife and mother.

Brad said...

No, I think you're right on. My ex-wife and my two kids are very heavy into the church, and the church defines them. I know when I believed, it defined me. I felt sorry for my family, because they didn't go to church. When I finally got out, my relationship with my parents, who were not church goers, completely changed. I saw them for who they are and not who I wanted them to be. I feel sorry for my kids, I'm an outsider to them, I know, because that's what I thought of my parents and siblings. Sometimes I find it's tough to associate with them at times. But, I just do the best I can.

Heather said...

Sadly, I see this in missionary moms all around me.

Mormon411 said...

Andy, yes, a Mormon woman's main role is to be a mother. If you are unmarried at the ripe old age of 21, it is time to enter panic mode! Even worse if you are infertile.

Brad, I have also been in your position, having my father leave the church while I was still a believer. I viewed him as having been fallen and deceived. But just as you and I and many others have seen the truth, there is always a chance that your kids might too. And if not, make sure that whatever relationship there isn't, is never by your choice.

Me too, Heather. In fact, I have an old friend that I was recently re-acquainted with. Back then, her son was just a toddler and is currently on a mission. I see the same sorts of FB posts from her as well.

BraeggerBoy said...


I agree with you about the unmarried thing. My grandparents are very strong in the church and really forced it onto my aunt. Later in life my aunt found out she couldn't have childern and she was so upset and so depressed she actually ended up taking her life. She didn't feel worthy to live because she felt she was a failure to God. It's actually really sad.

Mormon411 said...


I am really sorry to hear that. Thank you for sharing. This, sadly, is one of the true fruits of Mormonism.. depression, feelings of inadequacy, even suicide.

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