Sunday, October 3, 2010

The Atheist Hymnal

Atheism has never had any songs... until now!



Atheists Don’t Have No Songs (AKA The Atheist Hymnal)

Chris­tians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nag­i­la’s for the Jews,
Bap­tists have the rock of ages,
Athe­ists just sing the blues.

Ro­man­tics play Claire de Lune,
Born agains sing “He is risen,”
But no one ever wrote a tune,
For god­less ex­is­ten­tial­ism.

For Athe­ists there’s no good news. They’ll never sing a song of faith.
In their songs they have a rule: the “he” is al­ways low­er­case.
The “he” is al­ways low­er­case.

Some folks sing a Bach can­ta­ta,
Luther­ans get Christ­mas trees,
Athe­ist songs add up to nada,
But they do have Sun­days free.

Pentecostals sing to heav­en,
Cop­tics have the books of scrolls,
Nu­merol­o­gists can count to seven,
Athe­ists have rock and roll.

For Athe­ists there’s no good news. They’ll never sing a song of faith.
In their songs they have a rule: the “he” is al­ways low­er­case.
The “he” is al­ways low­er­case.

Atheists don’t have no songs.
Chris­tians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nag­i­la’s for the Jews,
Bap­tists have the rock of ages,
Athe­ists just sing the blues.

Catholics dress up for Mass,
And lis­ten to, Gre­go­ri­an chants.
Athe­ists just take a pass, Watch foot­ball in their un­der­pants.
Watch foot­ball in their un­der­pants.

Atheists don’t have no songs.

Performed live on April 29, 2010 by Steve Mar­tin and The Steep Canyon Rangers

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hahaha! Very amusing! I'm not exactly atheist but I don't conform to any one "religion". Still! A good laugh right here.

Mormon411 said...

You don't have to be atheist to appreciate this song. If you have a sense of humor, it's just funny!

Catherine Mackie said...

I consider myself to be a believer with a difference... I follow the Christian faith but it is only some 15 years ago that I believe I came to understand the Truth about God... I do not believe that Jesus Christ was God... I do believe that one's relationship with God is a very personal experience... I do believe that we are all God's children, just as Jesus, the Christ, was one of God's children. I'm sorry that you are so far from Him (capital H) because of doctrines and creeds that you cannot see that He does exist... A relationship with God is, and always has been, a one-on-one affair. Try not to be so angry and listen for the sweet small voice of calm that would be Him guiding your path... God is not a mormon, or a muslim, or a christian. Those are man-made concepts of God. God is God. I call myself a christian because that is the path I was following when I found the Truth about Him. Don't want to get into any debates about His existence. Just wanted you to understand that not everyone who calls themselves a christian believes that Jesus was God.